Ten Reasons Why America Isn’t Wild About Soccer

1. We Didn’t Invent It

Football, baseball and basketball are American sports. As for ice hockey, we’re humoring the Canadians on that one.

But soccer is in the category of “other” sports that include cycling, rugby, curling and cricket.

2. Multi-language aspect of the game prevents proper understanding of on-field insults.

3.Soccer hair

Wet, unruly and lots of it.

4.Soccer fans

They’re just plain scary.

The Dutch all show up in orange, and look vaguely demented …

… the English want to fight …

… and the Brazilians come to dance.

The average international soccer crowd makes a Miami Dolphins - New York Jets football game seem like a ladies club social.

5. Not enough scoring in soccer

Too many games end without either team getting a goal.

If you watch something for two hours and nobody scores, you’re either at a soccer game — or a Star Trek convention.

6. So many games end in a tie

This is clearly un-American. America likes victory, even when its only an imaginary one.

7. Deciding a game by penalty kicks

Sometimes the only way to come up with a champion is to have a round of penalty kicks after the game.

I recall the Brazil-Italy World Cup final in 1994. The game ended after regulation play plus extra time in a 0-0 tie. Italy lost because during the penalty kick phase, Roberto Baggio, kicked one over the crossbar of the goal.

Ending a game this way is like deciding a champ by holding a spelling bee.

Americans prefer the baseball model, where teams keep playing the game for as many innings as it takes for somebody to break the tie.

8. Players faking injuries

When players lose the ball to a player on the other team, the usual reaction is to flop on the pitch, as if the victim of a horrible foul that appears to have caused a career-ending injury.

The player stays immobile on the field in a state of theatrical paralysis until the referee stops play, and orders that the player be carried off the field in a stretcher.

The injury lasts precisely as long as it takes the stretcher to reach the touchline. Once off the field, the player bounds out of the stretcher, fully recovered, and ready to rejoin the game at the next opportunity.

In America, people who want to fake injuries have a different venue just for them: It’s called the courthouse.

9. Excessive celebration after goal scoring

American baseball players rarely show emotion on the field, even after hitting a home run. American football players can get penalized for excessive celebration on the field. And in basketball, there’s so much scoring, that players usually only have time for a single thrust of a fist in the air before they have to dash down the court to prevent the next score.

But in soccer, because goals are so far and few between, the celebration seems to have no bounds.

A goal is usually cause for diving onto the pitch to await the rest of your team to pile on top of you in some kind of ritualistic S&M exhibition.

10. Mexico beats the U.S. too often

This is clearly problematic. How are we supposed to build a wall along their border and play the role of the superior nation when they routinely beat us in soccer?

Clearly, America won’t begin to fully embrace soccer until we can ensure that when Mexicans come here, it will be to be exploited by American employers, not to celebrate the soccer prowess of their national team.

Everyone knows to wear “Green”
on March 17th ...
But why? ...
And who was St. Patrick??

Saint Patrick was the missionary credited with converting the Irish to Christianity in the late 300’s A.D.

Historical sources report that Saint Patrick was not even Irish! He was born around 373 A.D. in either Scotland or in Roman Britain (the Romans left Britain in 410 A.D.). His real name is believed to have been Maewyn Succat, but he changed it to Patrick after he became a priest. At the age of 16, while living in Ireland, he was kidnapped by pirates and sold into slavery.

During his 6-year captivity, he worked as a shepherd. He found strength in his faith. He finally escaped and made it to France, where he became a priest (and later a bishop).

When he was about 60 years old, St. Patrick traveled back to Ireland to spread the Christian word. He used the green shamrock, which resembles a three-leafed clover, as a metaphor to explain the concept of the Trinity - father, son, and holy spirit. The Irish people embraced him. The old saint died in his beloved Ireland, March 17th, about 460 A.D. The land which once enslaved him, he had set free.

Today, Saint Patrick's Day is a basically a time to wear green and party. The first American celebration of Saint Patrick's Day was in Boston, Massachusetts, in 1737. As the saying goes, on this day "everybody is Irish!" Over 100 U.S. cities now hold Saint Patrick's Day parades, the largest held in New York City.

Smashing Smurf Communism?

After making my UNICEF Smurf post, I was introduced to a much deeper aspect of the Smurf controversy.  First, some background.  This is long, but interesting.  From Wikipedia:

Smurf communism refers to the collection of theories of the supposed political system of the popular comic book and animated series, The Smurfs, created by Belgian cartoonist Peyo. According to supporters of these ideas, there are many parallels between communist ideology/practices and the way that these fictional characters lived together. These comparison theories are based on watching the animated series, and not any comments by Peyo, or others involved in production of the series.

Papa Smurf has a beard, which some feel looks like Karl Marx, who is considered the father of socialistic thinking. He is the red father to other villagers, due to his crimson slacks and cap. While there was no revolution, and he was not a leader of a revolution like Vladimir Lenin, he does have the final say in matters, often overruling Brainy Smurf when he oversteps his boundries. In several episodes when Papa Smurf is not present, the Smurf Village's utopian system destablizes with the lack of his leadership. Papa Smurf is the embodiment of the egalitarian spirit; he alone is influential enough to keep the utopian ideal in check. Papa Smurf suceeds where real-life communist leaders have failed; he keeps the system stabilized and free of corruption.

Brainy Smurf, like Leon Trotsky has round spectacles. Trotsky, who many felt was the more intelligent (and less brutal) idealogue than Stalin, as Brainy Smurf, seizes power in several episodes when Papa Smurf is away. A high ranking official under Lenin, Trotsky was later exiled for being a traitor because his ideas clashed with Stalin's; many consider Trotsky's ideas on economic and social reform to be more practical than those of Stalin and the Soviet leadership. Brainy also thought too much for his own good. He was alone in his willingness to question the ideals of Smurfism, his own ideas at times getting him into trouble from Papa Smurf and his peers. He is often isolated, ridiculed or even ejected from the commune of the village for his ideas.

The Smurfs wear standard clothing (with the notable exception of Papa Smurf): a simple white cap and white slacks. Each smurf has minor accessories that differentiate them from each other. This systematic uniform can be seen by some as a representation of a Mao suit from The People's Republic of China. This is a representation of equality.

The evil wizard Gargamel, and his loyal feline worker, Azrael can be seen as the forces of capitalism. Gargamel desires the Smurfs in order to turn them into gold through a process of boiling. His greed drives him to great lengths in parallel of the Cold War and it's propagandic style. The capitalistic forces want to devour socialism, as the West wanted to do to the USSR and its satellites during the Cold War through its tactic of encirclement. Gargamel can be seen as a pure capitalist; he wishes to turn everything into a commodity - including people. As the ultimate supercapitalist, he is more concerned with his own wealth than with equality and fairness. Like any Adam Smith style capitalist, it is his 'natural' state to yearn for as much wealth as possible.

Gargamel forces Azrael, his ginger cat, to do almost all of the laborious and/or dangerous activities in his various plots to catch the Smurfs. Azrael can be seen as the proletariat, being exploited by Gargamel, the bourgeoisie. Azrael is uncomplaining, or, since he has no voice (i.e. trade unions), is metaphorically unable to complain. He cannot negotiate his wage - he eats whatever he is given by his master. One could say Azrael sustains on starvation wages.

Gargamel can be seen as the physical stereotype for capitalism: a man, totally consumed by greed.

The Smurfs live in an egalitarian utopia. Each smurf has a particular skill and each perform tasks to the benefit of the community. There is no system of monetary exchange or even barter in the Smurf village. The village is under a planned economy, under the leadership of Papa Smurf, and to some extent, Brainy Smurf.

The food in the Smurf Village was stored away in mushrooms the minute it was harvested and then equally distributed to all the Smurfs throughout the year. No one "farmer smurf" sold his crop to one smurf or another. It was understood that the crop was for the entire Smurf population, not for the sale or profit of one smurf alone - an example of collective farming.

In the Smurf Comics, Finance Smurf introduced a short-lived system of monetary exchange, based upon the gold standard. He introduces the system after he is exposed to capitalism by trekking to a town in order to retrieve some medicine. He is portrayed as being logically short sighted; the system he introduces leads to corruption, poverty, malnutrition, and general discontent. In addition the monetary system increased the danger to the village, as Gargamel wished and tried to seize the Smurfs' stockpile of coinage.

Each member of the community is a Smurf, and each has Smurf as a suffix to their own name; this can be seen as analagous to the use of "comrade." The Smurfs have a tendency to use the word 'smurf' as a prefix or suffix to many sentences. This could be seen as a form of propaganda, or a way to eliminate influences from other cultures. This is similar to what was practiced under Soviet Russia.

With the exception of Smurfette, the Smurfs are completely male. Smurfette herself was created by Gargamel using magic in one episode - she was sent in as an evil force to corrupt and infiltrate the other smurfs. Upon reaching the village, Smurfette had stiff black hair. Using a spell, Papa Smurf broke Gargamel's hold on Smurfette and she became one with the Smurfs--only now she had blond hair. Smurfette's introduction serves to reinforce the egalitarian idea. The Smurfs sometimes do treat Smurfette as an object of attraction, but the majority of the time they hold a respect and place of her that is on the equal ground of the males; Smurfette did not encounter a glass ceiling in Smurf Village.

Smurfs are very open to each other's differences. Yet with these difference, there are not any cases of taunting at their expense, due to difference in lifestyle. This reinforces the ideals of acceptance in communism and utopian socities.

The Smurf society was composed of almost all males and there was almost no population growth. Like most children's shows of the time, sex and reproduction was something was simply not discussed. Some views of history claim records show the most sucessful communes are ones that stay small in population. This is to conserve resources, reduce social conflict, and maintain a high standard of life on an egalitarian scale. Smurfs only found problems with each other due to individual character faults: Brainy's aloofness and condescending attitude, Vanity's obssession with his own apperance, and so on.

A true Marxist is an atheist. There is no mention of god in Smurf comics, and there is no Priest Smurf. There are only forces of nature and physics, and these are represented metaphorically by the characters of Mother Nature, Father Time and through man-made creations such as Clockwork Smurf. Of course, there is also magic, as practised by Papa, Gargomel, Balthazar and others, but it is simply another tool, something that occurs in nature, that has physical properties and can be tapped into, with the right know-how. It is not, as many religions are, a way of understanding the universe in a supernatural context.

• Communism fell in Russia around the time that The Smurfs were lost from tv syndication and comic publication.

• Some websites have argued that "Smurf" is an acronym for "Socialist Men Under Red Father" or "Soviet Men Under Red Father" as a further argument to strengthen Smurf Communistic theory. This theory is likely apocryphal, as the word Smurf originally came from "Schtroumpf", an invented Flemish word comparable to the English "watchmacallit."

Got all that?  OK.  Now, think about this: The Belgian UNICEF video shows vintage WWII bombs dropping from the air on the communist Smurfs.  The message here obviously from the good people at UNICEF is that if you adopt communism, you will die violent deaths.  In order to keep it appropriate for UNICEF, they stick that benign message at the end.  UNICEF really needs to stay away from political rhetoric.  I'm still appalled.

And I like to randomly underline words. Deal with it!

Hey! I came across this lookin up stuff on the Internet. I want to hear peoples thoughts! Post a comment, ok!

A Letter to Mankind

Dear fellow human,  

Today humanity is being challenged. Unthinkable atrocities take place on daily basis. There is an evil force at work that aims to destroy us. The agents of this evil respect nothing; not even the lives of children. Every day there are bombings, every day innocent people are targeted and murdered. It seems as if we are helpless. But we are not!  

The ancient Chinese sage Sun Zi said, "Know your enemy and you won't be defeated". Do we know our enemy? If we don't, then we are doomed.  

Terrorism is not an ideology, it is a tool; but the terrorists kill for an ideology. They call that ideology Islam.  

The entire world, both Muslims and non-Muslims claim that the terrorists have hijacked "the religion of peace" and Islam does not condone violence.  

Who is right? Do the terrorists understand Islam better, or do those who decry them? The answer to this question is the key to our victory, and failure to find that key will result in our loss and death will be upon us. The key is in the Quran and the history of Islam.  

Those of us, who know Islam, know that the understanding of the terrorists of Islam is correct. They are doing nothing that their prophet did not do and did not encourage his followers to do. Murder, rape, assassination, beheading, massacre and sacrilege of the dead "to delight the hearts of the believers" were all practiced by Muhammad, were taught by him and were observed by Muslims throughout their history.  

If truth has ever mattered, it matters most now! This is the time that we have to call a spade a spade. This is the time that we have to find the root of the problem and eradicate it. The root of Islamic terrorism is Islam. The proof of that is the Quran.  

We are a group of ex-Muslims who have seen the face of the evil and have risen to warn the world. No matter how painful the truth may be, only truth can set us free. Why this much denial? Why so much obstinacy? How many more innocent lives should be lost before YOU open your eyes? A nuclear disaster is upon us. This will happen. It is not a question of "if" but "when". Oblivious of that, the world is digging its head deeper in the sand.  

We urge the Muslims to leave Islam. Stop with excuses, justifications and rationalizations. Stop dividing mankind into "us" vs. "them" and Muslims vs. Kafirs. We are One people, One mankind! Muhammad was not a messenger of God. It is time that we end this insanity and face the truth. The terrorists take their moral support and the validation for their actions from you. Your very adherence to their cult of death is a nod of approval for their crimes against humanity.  

We also urge the non-Muslims to stop being politically correct lest they hurt the sensitivities of the Muslims. To Hell with their sensitivities! Let us save their lives, and the lives of millions of innocent people.  

Millions, if not billions of lives will be lost if we do nothing. Time is running out! "All it takes for evil to triumph is for good people to do nothing." Do something! Send this message to everyone in your address book and ask them to do the same. Defeat Islam and stop terrorism. This is your world, save it.  

The ex-Muslim Movement

www.faithfreedom.org

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